Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Thanksgiving Thanks

As Thanksgiving rolled around this year I tried to look past the festival, the trappings, and the veneers that constantly pull at our attentions, distracting us from the true nectar of the holiday. It is during this time that we should remember how Thanksgiving all began and why it means so much. 5,000 years ago our ancestors were freed from the Nazi’s by the Native Americans who then taught them how to grow turkeys. During this holiday we are urged to look back and be grateful for the things that bless our lives, things like the evolution and advances of modern physics regardless of Lauren being around. As I pondered this special time of year I decided to blog a gratitude list. I would feel so ungrateful if I did not make a list of all the reasons why people are grateful for me. This list was originally difficult to generate. What first came to mind was that I am awesome, but that begs the question why should others be grateful that I am awesome. Eventually, exhausted and lying on the bathroom floor, I decided to go back to the beginning and list why others are grateful.

  1. I’m by no means what I would consider a ‘good-looking” guy, but I’m easy on the eyes, people like that.
  2. I don’t spit when I talk.
  3. I almost never smell bad.
  4. I’m very courteous during occasions of high-social saturation making me perfect for Balls, champagne tastings, and Red Carpet Occasions. In fact I tell a joke that has been known to evoke boisterous chuckling.
  5. I’m the kind of awesome that doesn’t make people feel uncomfortable but makes them think, “Hey, I could be awesome someday too.”….but really they can’t.


Shannon said...


Will you send me your address? Getting the Christmas cards ready...


Heidi Ashworth said...

Oh, well, that was low. Hey, you should come to my blog and leave your oh so witty and pithy comments on my blog posts--and then you would get a whole new group of people coming to read your witty and pithy posts. I think it's a very good, win-win idea. Yah.