Fly in the House

I don’t know what more I can say than the title has already said. There is a fly in our house, one fly. It has been in our house for about a week now. I would like to be able to give a more specific time period but the days have all run together in some sort of marathon for the damned. It is thoroughly maddening to have a spot of black horror fly across my vision every few minutes and then disappear. Both Annie and I have desperately sought for a way to rid ourselves of this flying death that pursues us. At any given point in the day either Annie or myself will suddenly explode into bouts of epileptic arm waving. Startled by these insane antics the other will ask what ails him or her and will quickly realize that it is that cursed orbiting of the devil fly. It is even worse when it wreaks havoc upon our ears. The constant buzzing has accompanied my every waking moment leaving blunt-trauma induced comas as the only reprieve from the madness. How the fly entered our apartment is still a mystery known only in the vilest circles of Hell. If this were the extent of the story it would not be one of such woe, but there is more. This fly is more than a fly. It would be simple enough to kill it except…..IT NEVER LANDS!! The Fly is constantly airborne as if fueled by our hate for it. As a last resort Annie and I have thrown out all of our food hoping that with nothing to eat the fly will soon starve. But seriously, this fly is driving us insane.